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Summer 2007
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Summer 2007
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ur newsletter will promote principles of personal success for women. These ideas will illustrate success in the working world, in interpersonal relationships, and in developing self esteem and confidence. Each member will bring special knowledge about attaining personal goals and adding a sense of discovery and excitement to women's lives.
"You have special gifts and talents that you are meant to share; you know what they are. They are what everyone tells you that you do so well, that you do easily while others struggle, that you would do if you were not getting paid, because you love doing it so much."
"...how can you put this interesting idea to work for you? The answer: think positive thoughts! Since you're always operating on your last thoughts, even when asleep, be sure your last thoughts before going to sleep are good, positive thoughts!"
"Last year, I was engaged in a great deal of spiritual and emotional work to resolve some long-standing personal issues - and it was very successful for me. With the support, assistance and encouragement of my counselors..., I was actually utilizing the principles of The Secret without realizing I was doing so..."
"In our culture of acquisition, the promise of wealth, houses, cars, and all the luxuries our minds can conjure, not to mention the perceived power such trappings appear to magnetize once more appeals to our self-centered, "all about me" way of life. Next to sex and a quick cure for our every discontent, nothing sells better."
"...the goals you set are great fuel for getting you out of bed in the morning and inspiring the work you do during the day. But you can't rely on them to save you from your life. You don't want to fall into the trap of what my husband likes to call "Thenility," which is the idea that when certain conditions are met, then you'll be happy, successful, content, complete."
Carol Akright writes, “In addition to my private practice in investment and wealth management, I continue to offer lectures aboard Princess Cruise lines - most recently on a Norwegian Fjord cruise. This fall, I will be starting a "WOMEN’S MILLIONAIRE CLUB" -- for women who want to become multi-millionaires in the next five years. This is a two-month intensive program with a follow-up Millionaire Mentoring. For more information, you can contact me at akrightcr1@aol.com.”
Lenann McGookey Gardner reports, “My book tour through the Midwest and down the East Coast was intense and very successful! Barnes & Noble just reordered, for nationwide distribution, 450 copies of my new book, Got Sales? The Complete Guide to Today’s Proven Methods for Selling Services, which you can purchase from them or from Amazon.com. Or, better yet, you can order an autographed copy directly from me at www.YouCanSell.com (price is the same)! We also have the book available on CD (read by the author - with actors doing the selling dialogues, demonstrating what to say and what not to say when you’re selling).”
“We also have a new 27-minute CD called ‘Driving to the Sales Meeting’ for you to play in your car when you are - um - driving to sales meetings! If you need to update your selling skills, they’ll be a great help to you. Also, check out my May appearance on Family Matters Radio. Go to www.FamilyMattersRadio.com and click on the Podcast for 5/27/07, Hour 2, Segments 3 and 4, titled “Boost Your Bottom Line”. Finally, we’re excited to introduce you to our new state-of-the-art website at www.YouCanSell.com, due to go live this month!”
Jane Blume assumed the presidency of the New Mexico Chapter of The Association for Women in Communications (AWC) in mid-May. “AWC’s end-of-year banquet and new-officer installation was a totally delightful and heartwarming experience, because the inspirational guest speaker was my very own daughter (and this issue’s guest contributor), Kathryn.”
On Tuesday, August 14, Jane will present a free seminar, “Don’t Be a Well-Kept Secret: Increase Your Visibility and Build Your Reputation” for Exhib-It! Trade Show Marketing Experts in Albuquerque. For reservations and information, call 505-828-0574.
AWC’s Program Committee has also requested that she present an advanced PR seminar, “Ask Jane: Challenges in Public Relations,” during a full day of activities devoted to educating the community about public relations on Wednesday, September 26. For more information, call Jane at 505-294-1976.
Shelby Smith-Sanclare is now scheduling evening and daytime workshops - starting the week of August 6 - to apply the principles of attraction to your life. For more information, contact her at (505) 237-2005, or sssanclare@hotmail.com.
Kathryn Blume remounts her multi-character one-woman show about global warming, The Boycott, at Vermont Stage Company in Burlington July 26-28, and will bring it to the ArcLight Theatre in New York City for a six-week run October 11 - November 18. For more information, please visit www.KathrynBlume.com.
sn't it interesting that a law that has been universally true for centuries is now taking the modern world by storm?
By now, you no doubt have seen or read Australian producer/author Rhonda Byrne's bestselling DVD/book, "THE SECRET," in which she reveals how "The Law of Attraction" works in everyone's life, whether they are consciously aware of it or not. If you focus your thoughts on negative things-worries about debt or bills that pile up, you'll get more of the same-more debt, and more bills. Even if you say you DON'T want the debt and the bills, your mind cannot distinguish between DO WANT and DON'T WANT-it just registers debts and bills.
By contrast, if you focus on wealth and abundance, they will come to you easily in ways you might never have imagined. And, according to Byrne, this law applies to you, whether you believe in it, or not. And, I must say, as a financial advisor, that I have seen how the positive power of the "Law of Attraction" works in both my clients' lives, and in my own.
One woman came to me with a dream of starting a horse breeding business. She wanted to raise Irish Draught horses. She focused on this every time we got together, and as we built a financial strategy that accomplished her and her husband's goals of both financial security and dream fulfillment, she was able to manifest this dream. Two years later, she has bought her brood mare, who has been bred twice, producing one foal, and is she now looking for a stallion to sire the next generation of Irish Draught babies.
Furthermore, this dream has sustained her through some otherwise difficult times, when health challenges seemed to thwart her from realizing her dream. She has attracted the right people to help her in this business, she's now regionally known as a major horse breeder in her state, and I am sure she'll gain national prominence one day as a woman devoted to this breed, whose very survival was threatened by dwindling numbers. She is a "riding" example of "THE SECRET" at work.
As for me, I always had the dream of traveling abroad, worldwide, on business, as my father did some forty years ago. So, at the end of my morning mediations, I spoke affirmations aloud, in the present tense, of course, as if they were already happening. Some were about the thirteen major trips abroad that I wanted to take - and take now.
Amazingly, three weeks after starting to focus my thoughts on international travel, I got a phone call from a friend who has been speaking as a naturalist on cruise ships. She said that one cruise line she worked for was seeking financial speakers, and she thought I should apply. So I called, sent my press kit, and within a week I received a call from the Entertainment Director: "We would love to have you lecture on our ships; where would you like to go?" I was stunned! I had attracted my dream travel so quickly! Five years later, I now have visited over 30 countries on six continents and have completed 12 of my 13 major trips. I still have Antarctica to go!
I've discovered there are several key components to getting the Law of Attraction to work in one's life. First, follow Byrne's formula:
(1) ASK for what you really want-in every aspect of your life. Be patient, for while some goals will come sooner, you may need to wait a bit for others to "show up"-or they may come in disguise. It could be that to actually work at the career of your dreams, you might get laid off from your old job and feel a bit of panic. Don't worry. It's just the Universe saying that it's time to get going on your dream career.
(2) BELIEVE that you can truly have what you want-that you deserve the abundance of the Universe and a fulfilling life. Here is where you may run into trouble with old emotional or thinking patterns that put you in a negative state. Remember, you must intend a positive result, and you must understand that you are meant to live a life filled with love, joy, prosperity, and meaning. And I would add that you must live your life with a mighty purpose.
You have special gifts and talents that you are meant to share; you know what they are. They are what everyone tells you that you do so well, that you do easily while others struggle, that you would do if you were not getting paid, because you love doing it so much. Take an inventory of these talents and determine which one is your Unique Ability, as Dan Sullivan of the Strategic Coach calls it. Use this talent to offer your gifts to the world, and inevitably you then will reap the abundance of the "Law of Attraction."
(3) RECEIVE-this is the reward. Things start flowing to you. The more you ask for, the more intent your focus, the sooner you start the "attraction" ball rolling. Don't worry about HOW it will occur, the way to manifest the dreams, just be clear on the WHAT of your goals-be precise, be descriptive -the size and color and location of your dream home, the traits of your soul mate and the type of interaction you will share, the exact dollar amount you want to see in your brokerage account and in your bank account. If you want to become a multimillionaire-don't be shy-SAY SO! Take an old bank statement, white out the balance amount, and write in $10,000,000, or whatever is your wealth number.
One of the most important things to do is to begin experiencing how it will feel when you have that dream home, that financial sum, your soul mate. Imagine the feeling of joy, satisfaction, pleasure, sense of accomplishment, and sit in those feelings every day. Pick a time of day, be it early in the morning, or at night before bedtime. Close your eyes, and imagine your life as it is going to be when these dreams come true. Be vivid in the pictures in your mind.
You can even create a 'vision' board, as one of the men in the DVD did-or a vision notebook, with pictures of what you want in your life-the romantic relationship, the lovely home by the sea, your dream car, and the children/family life you yearn for. Look at these pictures daily, as part of your visioning homework. You'll be amazed how these detailed pictures will help manifest your WHATs (your dreams), and eventually the HOW will be revealed to you.
Lastly, I would say that I have known about the "Law of Attraction" for many years-I first heard about it from a motivational speaker named Brian Tracy. Then I read Napoleon Hill's primer on wealth building, THINK AND GROW RICH. Just as I have been reminded about this law with Byrne's bestselling movie, you likely will realize that you have heard about this concept before. If you have not been applying it to your life, why not do so now? Don't "try". Just do it!
I know you'll be pleased with the abundance that manifests in your life-abundance in health, wealth, and happiness. Good luck!
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Lenann McGookey Gardner is a Harvard M.B.A. and independent management consultant specializing in improving companies' sales and marketing results. She works with smaller businesses, as well as large companies, worldwide, and she also coaches individuals to higher levels of professional accomplishment and satisfaction. Call Lenann at 505.828.1788 when you want to grow your sales by closing the most desirable, highest profit business. Lenann is a winner of the American Marketing Association/New Mexico's Professional Services "Marketer of the Year" award, and is profiled in Who's Who in America. Visit her on the Web at www.YouCanSell.com. |
an "The Secret" Work in Your Life? You bet it can! The Secret can't NOT work!
In case you haven't read the book or seen the film, "The Secret" is the Law of Attraction. It's the idea that "Everything that's coming into your life you are attracting into your life. And it's attracted to you by virtue of the images you're holding in your mind. It's what you're thinking. Whatever is going on in your mind you are attracting to you."
Anyone who teaches people to sell, as I do, is familiar with the notion that, if you have a clear objective for a sales meeting - if you know, going in, what will have to happen in a sales conversation so that, when that conversation ends, you will feel that the meeting has been successful - and if you say that objective, out loud, three times, before you begin the conversation, the chance that you will achieve exactly that is very high!
But the book, The Secret, takes this concept much further. The Secret "…is the law that determines the complete order in the Universe, every moment of your life, and every single thing you experience in your life. It doesn't matter who you are or where you are, the law of attraction is forming your entire life experience, and this all-powerful law is doing that through your thoughts."
Wow! I've certainly found that to be true: you become what you think about most - good or bad! That's why it wasn't a good idea to identify myself as a "survivor". Yes, I survived the death of my mother at the age of 39 (I was three), an abusive stepmother, a neglectful father and some bizarre "housekeepers" with odd ideas about dealing with small children. But when I think of being a "survivor," I have to think about what I survived - which puts those negative thoughts into my mind! As the book says, "If you see it in your mind, you're going to hold it in your hand." And that applies whether the thing you see in your mind is good or bad!
Lots of people seem to think that, by focusing on, thinking through, remembering the bad stuff, they'll be able to somehow analyze themselves out of the pain. I don't think that's true. And The Secret supports me there: "The law of attraction doesn't care whether you perceive something to be good or bad, or whether you don't want it or you do want it. It's responding to your thoughts…"
The book also says that if you're thinking, "I don't want to be delayed," your mind is receiving, "I want delays." If you're thinking, "I can't handle all this work," your mind hears, "I want more work than I can handle." Think "I don't want to argue" and your mind hears, "I want more arguing"!
So, how can you put this interesting idea to work for you? The answer: think positive thoughts! Since you're always operating on your last thoughts, even when asleep, be sure your last thoughts before going to sleep are good, positive thoughts!
You might even think of this process as Biblical: what you sow, so shall you reap.
Or in the pop culture vernacular, "What goes around comes around!"
Think this doesn't make sense? Consider this: the book says, "If you don't understand the law, that doesn't mean you should reject it. You may not understand electricity, and yet you enjoy the benefits of it."
So, is this like someone saying, "Don't think of a pink elephant in your living room" … and suddenly, all you can think of is a pink elephant, parked right there on your sofa? Does the mere thought of The Secret make you think of all your negative thoughts - rather than the positive ones that will attract good to you? Here's what the book has to say about that: "One way to master your mind is to learn to quiet your mind. Without exception, every teacher in this book uses meditation as a daily practice."
I took a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction class at the University of New Mexico Hospital recently. Taught by an M.D. with a strong background in Eastern medicine and, yes, meditation, I found myself learning that meditation doesn't have to involve sitting still - there's walking meditation, too - and I felt noticed when the instructor, Dr. Brian Shelley, said, "The goal is to have you take at least one breath mindfully every day."
Hey, I can do that, even if - with my recent 50-pound weight loss - I think the 45 minutes it would take me to do the recommended meditation would be better spent sweating and increasing my fitness level! And I've learned that my mind can be kept more positive in the process. Try it!
I've written in past issues of this newsletter (see the archive) about the experience of fire walking - walking barefoot over a bed of burning coals - without injury. That's The Secret in action, because I'd been taught what to think during that little stroll, and the thoughts protected me from harm!
As the head of "Faith Care Ministries," and the person responsible for coordinating all the Hospital and Homebound Visitation, as well as the Stephen Ministry program for my church, I hear a lot of unhappy stories about illness, bereavement and loss. Even as a consultant advising salespeople, I hear a lot of negativity, a lot about scarcity (of money, and of time).
In situations of loss, I respond, as often as I can, that we feel loss because we love, and that we should try to focus on the warmth of the love rather than the pain of the loss.
In business, I respond that there is no scarcity of money! If you want to prove that, go take a drive through the wealthy part of your town. Here in Albuquerque, drive down Rio Grande Boulevard, or through Tanoan or High Desert, or through Las Campanas in Santa Fe. Overall, New Mexico may be a poor state, but there is PLENTY of money here. (You may not HAVE plenty of money, but that doesn't mean that there isn't plenty of money to be had in your area, too!)
What's standing in the way of achieving your heart's desire? Perhaps it's your thoughts! It may be worth considering that possibility, and acting to improve your thinking, focusing always on the positive.
And as you do that, here are a few more lines from The Secret to inspire you - words that I have found to be true and/or useful:
"Our feelings are a feedback mechanism to us about whether we're on track or not. When you are feeling good feelings, it is communication back from the Universe saying, `You are thinking good thoughts.'"
"You're getting exactly what you're feeling about, not so much what you're thinking about."
"You can begin right now to feel healthy. You can begin to feel prosperous. You can begin to feel the love that's surrounding you, even if it's not there. And what will happen is the universe will correspond to the nature of your song. The universe will correspond to the nature of that inner feeling and manifest, because that's the way you feel."
Make a list of some Secret Shifters to have up your sleeve. By Secret Shifter, I mean things that can change your feelings in a snap. It might be beautiful memories, thoughts of positive future events, funny moments, nature, a person you love, your favorite music. Then, if you find yourself angry or frustrated or not feeling good, turn to your Secret Shifters list and focus on one of them.
"If you think unkind thoughts about someone else, you will experience those unkind thoughts manifested. You cannot harm another with your thoughts, you only harm You. If you think thoughts of love, guess who receives the benefits - You!"
"Thought impregnated with love becomes invincible."
"The law of attraction is a law of nature. It is as impartial as the law of gravity."
So…what do you really want? Sit down and write it out on a piece of paper - in the present tense - and if you are clear, and you express yourself as if this has already occurred ("I am so happy and grateful now that ---- has happened!"), you have begun the process. In the words of marketing consultant Dr. Joe Vitale, who was quoted extensively in The Secret, "This is really fun. It's like having the Universe as your catalogue. You flip through it and say, `I'd like to have this experience and I'd like to have that product and I'd like to have a person like that.' It is You placing your order with the Universe. It's that easy!"
My last thought for this article: Happy Catalogue Shopping!
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Jane Blume, editor/publisher of our Defining Women newsletter, celebrates 41 years of professional work in communications this year. Jane founded Desert Sky Communications in 1989 to help businesses, non-profit organizations and individual entrepreneurs "get the right messages to the right audiences." Desert Sky's services include public relations, marketing and advertising strategies and execution; writing and editing; corporate identity; photography; facilitation; and innovative radio programs. For more information, call Jane at (505) 294-1976, email to or visit www.desertskycommunications.com. |
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he Secret" was definitely working in my life in 2006. It was the best year my PR firm ever had in terms of revenues and attracting interesting clients who were very different from those I have worked with before. Phil and I also enjoyed a wonderful Norwegian coastal cruise, with brief visits to Iceland and Germany before the voyage.
However, The Secret is not working for me quite as well this year! I'm still busy with Desert Sky Communications and our clients still come in on referral, but my income is definitely down. And I think I know why.
Last year, I was engaged in a great deal of spiritual and emotional work to resolve some long-standing personal issues - and it was very successful for me. With the support, assistance and encouragement of my counselors (including Defining Women contributor and kinesiology practitioner Janet Hall), I was actually utilizing the principles of The Secret without realizing I was doing so - until I read the book!
Last year, I engaged in spiritual practice every morning, envisioning that I would succeed in generating the income I required for various needs… in keeping myself healthy… in maintaining positive relationships with members of my family… in maintaining my thriving business, and keeping Desert Sky Communications' high ranking on New Mexico Business Weekly's list of the largest PR firms in New Mexico (we've ranked Number Three for two years).
My life changed this year: in February, two 8-week-old puppies joined our household, demanding a great deal of time and attention to train them and integrate them into our lives. (In addition to making sure that they are housebroken, there's the ongoing challenge that they are aggressively playful with our 10-year-old cat.)
In mid-May, I assumed the presidency of the New Mexico Chapter of The Association for Women in Communications, and had a lot of prior work to do to recruit a new Board and prepare for a Board retreat. And now that the retreat is over, there is even more activity required to ensure that we have a strong, positive year on my watch.
As I was thinking about this article, I realized that I needed the higher income last year to finance all the personal work I was doing and the alternative health and emotional/spiritual care that accompanied it - that is why I received the funding!
This year, I haven't felt the need (and therefore, haven't received the income) to engage in my personal work and alternative health care so intensively. I've also used my new (but admittedly limited) knowledge of kinesiology, the science of muscle testing, to find out if I need the personal and alternative work right now, and the answer - for the moment, anyway - is no.
I have also felt I needed to be careful that the demands of my business don't overwhelm these other important responsibilities I have taken on. Because we've putting the puppies to bed late, I haven't had (or made) the time to engage in daily spiritual practice on a regular basis.
However, I've just begun to notice something recently about myself that I don't especially like: I've noticed that my hard-won serenity has begun to slip a bit… that I've been fretful and have lost my temper with my husband of 44 years, Phil, more than once over puppy management issues… and that I've been more anxious about my business than I need to be after all this time (and receiving a Small Business Administration Award this year as Home Based Business Champion).
I know what the answer is, and it's a simple one: re-engage in my spiritual practice - and do it as soon as possible. It is clearly more of a priority for me at present to work on the spiritual aspects of my life than on taking my PR firm to new heights - but I wouldn't object if the secondary benefit were to be realized eventually!
Actually, the knowledge The Secret reveals isn't a very well kept secret at all, but rather, has been the subject of open study for many centuries. In fact, the idea dates back nearly 3,000 years to early Hindu teachings that "like attracts like," and it is one of the areas of oral traditions, metaphysical inquiry, a cornerstone of many of the New Thought churches, the subject of many of Jesus' miracles, as well as one of the core curriculum requirements for most of the schools of coaching.
A search of the Web will reveal many sites that promote classes, seminars, books, and other venues for learning and practicing the concepts. It goes under different names, but it is the same model-the principle of attraction. And, it is not "the" secret, but one of many principles that support a wholesome, well-rounded life-view.
The critics have come out in full force as well, and many of their points are well founded. In our culture of acquisition, the promise of wealth, houses, cars, and all the luxuries our minds can conjure, not to mention the perceived power such trappings appear to magnetize once more appeals to our self-centered, "all about me" way of life. Next to sex and a quick cure for our every discontent, nothing sells better. Ask any advertising pro. The promotion for The Secret was a stroke of true marketing genius. As Sara Nelson, editor of Publishers Weekly said, "Nobody ever went broke overestimating the desperate unhappiness of the American public." This key of following three simple steps: Ask, Believe, Receive -makes it seem to be a "slam-dunk" for success.
Unfortunately, these critics also remind us of the flip side to The Secret. As many psychologists note, the tendency toward "magical thinking" can lead people to spend money they don't have believing more will appear, for example. Others are wisely point out that our tendency toward blame rather than accountability and action can lend itself to thinking all the tribulations of the world, the catastrophic acts of nature, the acts of genocide, and major illnesses such as cancer and AIDS are brought upon us because of wrong thinking. Thus, if bad things happen to you or in our world, it's all the fault of either individual or group thinking and thereby attracting it. In other words, this is all "your" fault!
By blaming other people for their own misfortunes, it is easy to ignore bigger concerns and the role we play in the affairs of all humankind. Avoiding thinking about these larger issues, and focusing only on our own desires, make The Secret seem a petty, mean-spirited, wholly selfish, and sometimes dangerous approach to living our lives.
So, with that preamble, how does The Secret affect my life? Well, I have used the attraction principle to find parking spaces, achieve effortless driving on busy interstates, and find lost articles-sometimes. Most of the larger wishes like the dream house, the ideal workload, and the perfect soul mate have been more illusive, even with my spiritual work and coach training.
Other times, I've wanted something in the worst way only to get it and realize that what I wanted had some undesirable "extras" that I didn't want. In fact, I'm sure you have unknowingly practiced the principle of attraction and have received exactly what you wanted - and then realized the price you had to pay wasn't worth it. There is an old adage that says, "Be careful what you wish for. You just may get it." I'd say that we've been asking and receiving for quite some time, and have not been aware that we were applying the same principles as The Secret or The Law of Attraction.
Yes, like most people, I do have counter intentions to my desired goals, and at deep levels, my mind is also giving me messages about not deserving such desires. How many times have you wished for something and heard in the back of your mind, "I don't really deserve it," or have heard an old voice from the past saying, "Don't be so selfish, wanting such things!"? Harder yet are the times I've set goals to please others when within myself, I've really wanted something entirely different for my life.
There are other ways we set up roadblocks to our own successes by taking actions that are counter to our desired goals. Failure to act as well as acting in conflicting ways also can block our receiving what we've wanted. Let's use my lost keys as an easy example. I know that I had them to get into my house, but can I find them despite searching everywhere? Nope. A bit later, I remember that I came in and went directly to my desk to answer the phone that was ringing. Can I find them then? Not a chance. Seems that the miscellaneous clutter I've been meaning to clean from my desk, or at least put into some type of order, has been the "counter-action" to finding my keys.
After a bit of clutter clearing and re-filing, my keys appear. They were right there in the open, under my nose the entire time, but I couldn't see the keys for all the clutter!
I think what this positive thinking does do is raise our consciousness to possibilities so they can snag our attention, thus we notice the car pulling out of the parking space or the smaller space hidden between the minivan and the SUV.
In our coaches' training, we learn that in most people's lives, positive thought leads to success only through the transforming medium of action, so while it is important to "ask, believe, and receive," there is a crucial intermediary step after recognizing what we want and believing we can have it-we must take action.
How could it possibly hurt to affirm, visualize, and spend a lot of time thinking about whatever it is we are trying to accomplish in this world? Clarifying and focusing on a goal and devoting the required energy to take the necessary steps, avoiding the distractions, having persistence rather than giving up in the face of initial failure or setback, and maintaining both internal and external self-confidence are important, as are letting others know that we are pursuing this goal and are seeking their support and encouragement. Others can help keep us focused and raise the level of self-accountability, so we can stick to taking the necessary actions needed to achieve our goals.
For me, attaining my goals is only the first step on an inward and deeply spiritual journey. Understanding the Law of Attraction may be simple, but the practicing of it is anything but easy. When we allow for the possibility of its being true on any level, we are stepping on a path of self-discovery from which, unless we give up entirely, we never turn back.
Reaching specific, concrete goals is not the hard part, even though I'm sometimes spectacularly unsuccessful and at other times wildly successful. Attaining the deeper self-awareness that leads me to a more spiritual, peaceful, grateful, loving, and compassionate life is more difficult. It is this above all else I hope to achieve by the end of my lifetime. All the other baubles that bring joy, laughter, happiness, and harmony along the way are the dessert after a fulfilling meal. Nothing is better than sharing such a delicious meal with friends!
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Guest Columnist Kathryn Blume is a writer, actor, and solo performer currently touring The Boycott, her one-woman show about fighting global warming. She is the co-founder of the Lysistrata Project, the first worldwide theatrical event for peace, and has toured The Accidental Activist – her critically acclaimed one-woman show about Lysistrata Project – to over 30 cities in the US and Canada, receiving an Austin Critics Table Award nomination. She is an Artistic Associate at Vermont Stage Company in Burlington, where her play Vanya/Vermont – a modern adaptation of Anton Chekhov’s Uncle Vanya – premiered in the spring of 2005. In addition to her numerous theatrical credits, Kathryn has had essays published in the books MoveOn.org's 50 Ways To Love Your Countryy, Code Pink's Stop the Next War Now, Outcry - American Voices of Conscience Post 9/11, and 365 Ways to Change the World. Kathryn founded Earth on the Air, a nationally syndicated, award-winning radio program, and has taught yoga, acting, Shakespeare, stress-reduction, and public speaking in venues across the country. For more information visit her website, www.kathrynblume.com. |
As author Rhonda Byrne points out, the only things we have real control over are what we think, feel and do - or put more simply, we just have control over ourselves. And I believe the Law of Attraction and clear imagining are particularly useful is in the realm of personal growth, when we want to change or transform some aspect of our personality and behavior.
For example, in fundraising for my new one-woman show, I realized I needed to learn how to tell the story of the piece and what I'm trying to do with it in a very clear, quick, and succinct manner - no matter how attentive or receptive the person to whom I'm pitching the idea. I need to bring my sense of clarity and success into the room with me, and spending time focusing on both the details of my pitch and my absolute belief in the value of the show.
However, it's also important to remember that I can be a scintillating, brilliant spokesperson for my own work, and still not have every single person with whom I speak write me a big check. I can certainly increase the likelihood of their support, but I still need to hold the expectation of support very lightly - in an open hand, as it were, because the universe is a very big place and there are many, many forces at work, most of which are out of our control.
This came up a lot when I was working as an actor in New York and going to auditions every day. It became very important to make the distinction between the work I did on myself and on my audition material, and the specific outcome of any given audition. Actors are like furniture: you can be the most magnificent Chesterfield couch in the world, but if the director is specifically looking for an Eames chair, you must accept the truth of your "Chesterfieldness" with grace, and move on.
I frequently fell into the trap of thinking that if I could perfectly imagine and will myself into the role, then the role would be mine. I have vivid memories of working on an audition for a classical theater company. Not only did I prepare the audition in detail and do work that I was extremely proud of, I also spent the subsequent week making collages of what my life would be like if I got cast, lighting candles, journaling about the company and the show, and rearranging my schedule for when I started rehearsals.
Needless to say I was stunned, flabbergasted, when I didn't get cast in the show.
The key - and Rhonda Byrne brings this up to some degree, but I want to emphasize it here - is that the goals you set are great fuel for getting you out of bed in the morning and inspiring the work you do during the day. But you can't rely on them to save you from your life. You don't want to fall into the trap of what my husband likes to call "Thenility," which is the idea that when certain conditions are met, then you'll be happy, successful, content, complete. When I'm thin, then I'll have love in my life. When I'm a movie star, then I'll feel successful in my career. When I'm rich, then I'll be able to take a vacation.
What Rhonda Byrne is great about, is reminding you to focus on your gratitude. Or as the Buddhists say: Want what you've got. After all, the universe is 13 billion years old and your life is just a tiny, tiny, miniscule, microcosmic sliver of that. You're lucky to be alive at all, so you might as well enjoy it, and let the rest of what happens fall a little more lightly on your shoulders.
Just remember that you don't have to do it all perfectly, and if misfortune occurs - particularly illness - please don't blame yourself for not being able to think your way to perfect health. Do the best you can. Give yourself lots of hope and a strong sense that anything's possible. But it's ok - more than ok - to ask for lots of help as well.
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